It’s cheaper on foot!

On a nice sunny day a pilgrim in the Holy Land thought he would have a little boat excursion on the Sea of Galilee. Beckoning to a boatman he asked how much it would cost for a short trip across the water.
‘Seventy five dollars’ said the boatman.
Taken aback the pilgrim said ‘Isn't that quite exorbitant?’ but the boatman replied ‘Yes, but you must remember that this is where Jesus walked on the water’.
‘At those rates, I don't wonder’, came the pilgrim's quick answer.

Grandma tales

Grandma Jenny wanted to share her spiritual life with her grandchildren as much as she did her everyday life, so she often told them Bible stories when she baby-sat.   She also taught catechism to four to six year olds at the church where two of her grandchildren belonged.   One time, four year old grandson, Dylan had been asked to wash his hands all week because he had a cold.   That Sunday, as Grandma was talking about Jesus to the children, Dylan blurted out, ‘Germs and Jesus.   That's all I ever hear about.’

After putting her two grandchildren Heather, five and Andy, four to bed, Grandma Marie slipped into her pyjamas, took off her make up, put on some face cream and washed her hair.  Hearing the kids laughing and squealing, Marie wrapped a towel round her head and, with the cream still on her face, stormed into their room.   She ordered the children back to bed with threats that they wouldn't be going to the zoo the next day if they didn't go right to sleep.   After she left the room, she heard Andy say to Heather ‘Who was that?’